So I work in an office where the majority of employees are girls. This is both good and bad. On the upside two of them are pretty attractive and I enjoy staring at there ass's in tight black dress pants and short skirts. Cleavage days are always a plus. On the down side I get to hear non stop chatter about complete nonsense garbage topics in life that women find interesting. Like the review of last nights Hills episode. Who gives a fuck. Seriously who sits around and wishes they were more like someone else. Oh ya, I do every time I see Tom Brady walking around with Gisele.
Anyways, I polluted my system with like 20 delicious Labatt Blue's last night followed up by some extra hot chicken wings (since my Dad is in town and he has not had good Buffalo wings in years). Needless to say my stomach has scene better days. So I'm minding my own business in my cubicle over in the corner blowing rank gas like George Young blew cocaine. The smell has creeped its way out into the open and is now lodged itself inside of everyones nose. My boss just walked in and asked if there was some old food in the garbage or something.
Normally I would be at least somewhat embarrassed, but not today. I'm not even a suspect, the new girl is the prime target. All of the other girls in the office already don't like her because well because girls are BITCHES. She is large and in charge. She thinks she knows everything and really is quite brite and very nice. Her downfall is that she's fat and that alone is enough and on top of that she is very self confident. Those things just don't go together so she rubs the other girls the wrong way. She also stunk up the bathroom yesterday before one of the girls went in there. So now they have all automatically assumed it's her that is making the office smell. They continue to IM each other and myself behind the new girls back about how bad she smells. All I can do is sit back laugh and keep farting until this mess of grease and booze makes it out of my system. In the mean time, sorry fatty I'll let the girls continue to believe what they want to believe. Cheers!
